First meta blog post too, hm?
Hit that point where I couldn't decide on what to write about next. There's plenty of fillers...dreams, past events, but there should be a balance between that and what goes on right now. I shouldn't say there's plenty; I'll run out of them before I know it. If I stuck to a post every four days it would probably last me only four or five months. Recent things have happened, yeah, but I wouldn't rank it as something worth talking about just yet. Or maybe that's exactly the sort of thing I should bring up.
Before starting the blog I read up on reasons for blogging, and that led into discussions about expanding and maintaining viewership for generating profit which I wanted no part of. "I know, I'll place this little disclaimer at the top saying I only blog for my own health! Then I won't carry the burden of attempting to generate good content to serve the readers." That's not true, though. If I didn't care I wouldn't be worrying over the frequency of my posts or what I choose to post about, or using Twitter to announce posts. It's like a diary I never had, and I read out each entry in front of a wall in an alleyway. Public, but not that wide out in the open.
I think I also saw blogging as a practice in dedication, a trait I'm very much lacking in. The hours invested in World of Warcraft and the Touhou series almost all stemmed from a lack of self-control, and it surfaced again recently. Wanting to outdo someone's run, various challenges...they're not bad things, but if I'm feeling guilty in the back of my mind over how I impulsively spend my time, whether or not I succeeded, then perhaps I should be holding back. Worse yet is when I play while not really wanting to because I felt bored, despite having other things I could be focusing on.
For the last several days I've been streaming whenever I do play, ranging from 40 minutes to two hours. Two hours in one sitting is usually the upper limit for me anyway, but I keep it to that single session for the day rather than returning to it for more. There's also those common experiences I hear about in general when it comes to good runs appearing early, and then it's a lot of restarts until a slightly better one crops up way later, maybe. After the first day or two of streaming I stayed focused on what I'd be playing for. I made a mistake once after that by following someone's request to play PCB Lunatic (I don't remember if I was asking for suggestions) which I regretted because there was really nothing to gain from it after being away for so long. Nah, perhaps it sounds selfish because there's the audience to think about, but really...not worth it at this stage.
Most recent undertaking is a silly no-miss/bomb/border break/focus PCB Normal/Reimu-B (plus scoring) run. Mental note to talk about the learning process in general in a future post.
So, yeah, I thought I had more to say about dedication, but not at this time it seems. To reinforce the idea I'm planning to do something I should (but don't) want to do and I should have a post for it...let's say two posts from now, given a post every four days schedule. Something like that. It remains to be seen if I can hold myself accountable and continue to do so.
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